Sunday, January 30, 2005

I didn't know the 'Dubya was a P.A.

WOW! Just when I thought our fearless (and mindless), leader was a TOTAL moron, I find out through IMDB that he supposedly knows how to work as a camera op.

OUR PRESIDENT {OR PROD. ASS.}

And on the same search, check out Ted Bundy. I thought it ironic that both are considered mass murders by someone @ IMDB.

Blessed Be, Dr. S.

Friday, January 28, 2005

Movie Reviews of 2005 #04.B - Hide & Seek

This season of "horror" movies has just plain sucked moldy roadkill teat! This movie did not blow popcorn laden chunks as did Alone in the Dark, but it was not a horror flick as it has been hyped to be. As someone commented on IMDB "...the film is one extended cliché after another." I may still be in shock of how much Alone ~ Dark sucked.

That said, this is more of a phsycho-drama, with an attempt {badly} of suspence. At every turn in the movie, one of the three of us correctly predicted what was to happen next. It got to be a game of almost playing beat the clock to get your correct guess in first. Only we didn't have buzzers.

This is one of those movies that the horror doesn't lay on screen in the theatre.

The true horror is that someone signed off on it, they somehow got name-brand actors to participate, then got it released. And a whole butt-load of patrons mis-guided by the trailers, & hype will pay to see this in the first run.

My rating for this is replaced by the new title for DVD release: "Hide & Reek"
2.5 sodas / 2 bathroom / but no smoke breaks (it was freezing rain outside)

Blessed Be, Dr. S

Movie Reviews of 2005 #04 - Alone in the Dark

Plain & simple, I think the title refers to those that choose to go see this movie @ the theatre after opening weekend. Unless you have played the video game, you will not get 90% of the movie. THEY EVEN USED TRACKS FROM THE DAMN GAME AS BACKROUND FOLEY! And once you see this POS, you will want to make sure your friends & family do not end up $12.00 poorer, and themselves, alone in the dark.

I will not even qualify this with my normal ratings gauges. I will leave that to a quote from Butthead, "This sucked more than anything that has ever sucked before..."

Blessed Be, Dr. Strangelove

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Outsourcing is now with fries, a drink, but no free toy,

A friend sent me this in an email. Someone, somewhere, somehow thinks that is a good idea to outsource the drive-up windows @ McDonalds in Oregon to some call center in North Dakota.

I however think it is an extremely sick & dangerous idea.

It is bad enough that outsourcing has killed off the tech industry and 10's of thousands of jobs for those who went to school to learn the crafts needed for what they did in life. Now the fuckheads are replacing the minimum wage jobs of kids & those too stupid or lazy to learn a trade.

Check this out, it almost makes me wretch.

Blessed Be, Dr. Strangelove

Wednesday, January 19, 2005

Movie Reviews of 2005 #03 - Attack on Precinct 13

What can I say about a movie that kills off 3 of the first 5 people seen on screen after the Dolby logo?

FUCKIN - AWW - RIGHT!

This is one of the best things to come to Century in quite a while. We have violence, action, violence, no real love story sub-plot to bog things down, violence, a ton of bullets through the head, violence, SOMEBODY FINALLY KILLS JOHN LEGUIZAMO, and did I mention there is quite a bit of violent action?

Yes, there is quite a chasm of genres between this & my other pick of "Finding Neverland", but both are good movies for what they are in their own right. If you are going & expecting to see a full remake of the original, you will be disappointed. This is based & partially follows the original John Carpenter movie, but updates the storyline & adds enough twists to stand on its own, as well as a butt-load more blood & gore.

I once again will refrain from talking details of the scenes to avoid spoiling it for the viewer. However my biggest gripe is that Leguizamo's character was not one of the three killed in the first 4 minutes. God I hate him as a {pseudo} performer.

P.S. If you go to see the movie here @ Century, be forewarned of the trailer before the show for "The Cave". With its editing and such, expect to get at least two "shock jumps" in your seat. {Read: don't bother drinking your soda while watching}. This one looks to be a decent creepy-scare-thriller.

Blessed Be, and let's be careful out there...
Dr. Strangelove

Saturday, January 15, 2005

Movie Reviews of 2005 #02 - elektra

Umm, err, {cough}, how do I say this......

The viewing of elektra, {note no caps}, was hindered by the cold weather, being inside we all had our coats on all the same. I started watching the show with my coat on my lap expecting to hide the possible things going on down there. After the opening, {that I think every frame of "the red outfit" in the promos came from}, I did not have to worry about any stirrings *down there*.

After a while of attempting to figure out who blew who to get this released, we finally got another action scene. Then the standard sappy crap love injection got stuffed in, {but still, no nekkidness, and not another scene with the red lace top}. It wasn't for another 30+ minutes that we were placated by some more action. {no red outfit, damn!}.

We all then were force-fed the several back-plot storylines. This explained all the "what the F%$#ng hell are they doing" questions we had in the last 60 min. But still did not explain why this movie was promoted as an action thriller, when it is something that doesn't even get a single pinky up from a comic book freak the ranks of Kevin Smith or Aflack in MallRats.

All the same, the last 20 min almost live up to the action adventure genre, and we get to see the red outfit again, be it tight pants replacing the short frayed miniskirt. And they should have stayed with the skirt for diverting eyes from how silly she looks from a reverse shot walking away from the camera. {sorry led, she walks like a duck, & the spandex did not compliment her ass}. WHICH BRINGS ME TO.... also be prepared to squint HARD if there is any chance of seeing any T&A. Be it the DP, the Director, really bad print, or some contractual obligation, whenever elektra is on screen in an almost revealing shot, the screen goes close to 4 stops darker. For those non-photo enabled people, that is the difference between watching a movie, and watching a movie with welding goggles on. Get the point?

I hate to say it but, the rating goes as this:
31/32's cup of soda, with no bathroom or smoke breaks
QUALIFIED BY:
I almost finished off 32 oz. of soda in 2 hours.
We watched this in the farthest theatre in the 'plex from the bathroom, but really close to an outside door.
After 25 min. I needed a smoke. It was -17 degrees outside, with another -15 to 20 for windchill, almost the same reason I did not pee.

I did not want to miss something happening, that, in the long run did not happen anyway.

Plain & simple, don't bother the weather to see this movie. Wait until it runs on Spike-TV.

Blessed Be, Dr. Strangelove


Friday, January 07, 2005

Movie Reviews of 2005 #01 - White Noise

I figured I could do a running thing, then I got short of breath.

So then I decided to do a different running thing here by doing a series of posts on the movies I see in the dry runs we do @ the theatre, {A dry run is the 1st run of a print to check for any problems after they build all of the trailers and reels of a movie into one huge platter}.

Before I start though..... We now have the print *Finding Neverland* back again!!! Yes Led, it is in the building, it has been viewed, and it opens to the public {FINALLY!}, @ 11:55 this morning. I think it is one of the best movies to have come out in a batch of real crap that was released in the last 8 months. But I promised that I will not spill the details until Led, JetJr., & Sidero see it.

That aside, I saw White Noise this morning. I would hotlink the title to IMDB's page, but they give away something that ruins 3/4 of the movie.

It is a good movie, Michael Keaton stars as an architect that lost his wife, gets contacted by someone who says she is talking to him by means of EVP, which is short for Electronic Voice Phenomena, where you communicate via {for lack of a better phrase} dead channels on radios & TV's. Past that I really can't add to the storyline without saying too much to ruin the show for the viewer.

Several questions came up at the start of the show. After I asked "Why is Keaton cast as a construction related character so much?". That led to the query of when the last time he did a movie was. Which then begat the question ". . . his last movie, or his last GOOD movie?". And this went on as the three of us sat waiting for something scary to happen.

The movie was immediately impressive by the sound design, layering, and editing, but it took a long time with exposition to get to the creepy stuff. Even so, as we waited, some of the scenes were set up to the point of us guessing/knowing what was going to happen next, which lulled us into getting a bit of a leap when the creepy shit was let loose on us.

It is again a good movie, a great creep show once it gets going. After seeing it, it could cause one to think about turning the radio & TV off before going to bed at night.

After viewing it I was up in my workshop & the radio went to static when I walked by it. My neckhair stood up. I then went back down to the lobby as the two other guys were leaving me alone in the building for the night. At that time the farthest ceiling light of the west hallway in the theatre complex started randomly blinking on & off.

I immediately fixed the antenna on the radio, changed the lightbulb out, and made sure my cell phone was on & 911 was programmed.

All in all, I give White Noise a:
5/8's cup of soda, with no bathroom or smoke breaks.

That is how much soda I managed to drink during the show, where a full cup is bad because I didn't get into the flick, and no soda means I got into it enough that I forgot to drink, more/less lost track of time. The other two are self explanatory.

Blessed Be All, & Merry New Year!
Dr. Strangelove