I just thought to wish happy, {insert your applicable festival here}, to everyone. And for those of you that are considering taking pity on someone who may be a single person with no family or significant other living with them, and deciding to "just drop in to cheer them up" . . . .
DO NOT THINK OF IT!
You might see something like The true holiday celibate apartment.
You have now been warned.
But if you call ahead, we might wipe down the toilet seat.
For the time being, in the words of John Kricfalusi, {creator of Ren & Stimpy},
"Don't wizz on the electric fence"
Blessed Be, Dr. Strangelove
Friday, December 24, 2004
Thursday, December 09, 2004
Not the best way to get a date @ a concert
If you haven't heard already, some dipshit opened fire @ a club in Ohio killing at least four people before getting a lead sleeping pill himself from a cop that got into the club when the call came through. Two of the guys in the band were formerly in PANTERA, an 80's Rock "hair band" genre that you either like or hate. Although I don't think many people would take the distaste of a bands music this far.
The CNN Link: nightclub
Maybe he just got p.o.'d about the cover, bad drinks, or maybe nobody played with him through the glory hole.
Still the same, my thoughts go out to all that had been there. My thoughts go out to those injured & the families of the dead.
BUT, This shit SHOULD HAVE BEEN PREVENTED by the staff, be it door, security, bartender, wait-staff, or management. {START rant time}, THERE IS NO FUCKING EXCUSE FOR THIS HAPPENING ASIDE THAT NO ONE @ THE VENUE WAS PAYING ATTENTION TO THEIR FUCKING JOBS OF PREVENTING CRACKPOTS WITH GUNS TO JUMP UP ON THE m'F'ING STAGE, & HAVING THEM UP THERE STILL SHOOTING LONG ENOUGH TO STILL FUCKING BE THERE WHEN THE COPS SHOW UP!
Last week one of my co-workers was bitching about how at the Cher concert the security staff standing at the front of the stage were not allowed to turn around & watch the show on stage.
WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING JOB DUMBASS? YOU ARE BEING PAID TO WATCH FOR POSSIBLE STAGE CRASHERS & SHITHEADS WITH GUNS IN THE AUDIENCE, NOT TRY TO COUNT HOW MANY TAT'S THE SINGER HAS, OR CHAT UP SOME GAL OR GUY HOPING TO GET IN BED WITH THEM. {END rant time}
I am NOT sorry about my feelings. I have been at gigs both working/playing, and in the audience when fuckheads ruin the party & I had to deal with things. Those of you that know me, the Dr. is not a defensive lineman. But ever since having to literally 'firemans carry' through a large crowd, a female friend that had her leg broken by some shithead that was "moshing" but did not know the rules that if a person goes down on the floor, you do not beat & kick her. We had a car waiting outside by time we got to the door & went to the ER.
By the time we got home, it was 4.5 hours too late to get beer, our friend had 6-8 pins & bits of steel, as well as a cast, and the person that had caused this was still in the ER on the other side of town from the ass whooping that occurred to him after we had left and the guys in the band (we were there as friends of the band mind you), found out & unleashed the beasts on the schmuck.
I hope this kind of shit stops happening. Nothing comes of it except pain for everyone involved.
Blessed Be, & give thought to others,
Dr. Strangelove
The CNN Link: nightclub
Maybe he just got p.o.'d about the cover, bad drinks, or maybe nobody played with him through the glory hole.
Still the same, my thoughts go out to all that had been there. My thoughts go out to those injured & the families of the dead.
BUT, This shit SHOULD HAVE BEEN PREVENTED by the staff, be it door, security, bartender, wait-staff, or management. {START rant time}, THERE IS NO FUCKING EXCUSE FOR THIS HAPPENING ASIDE THAT NO ONE @ THE VENUE WAS PAYING ATTENTION TO THEIR FUCKING JOBS OF PREVENTING CRACKPOTS WITH GUNS TO JUMP UP ON THE m'F'ING STAGE, & HAVING THEM UP THERE STILL SHOOTING LONG ENOUGH TO STILL FUCKING BE THERE WHEN THE COPS SHOW UP!
Last week one of my co-workers was bitching about how at the Cher concert the security staff standing at the front of the stage were not allowed to turn around & watch the show on stage.
WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING JOB DUMBASS? YOU ARE BEING PAID TO WATCH FOR POSSIBLE STAGE CRASHERS & SHITHEADS WITH GUNS IN THE AUDIENCE, NOT TRY TO COUNT HOW MANY TAT'S THE SINGER HAS, OR CHAT UP SOME GAL OR GUY HOPING TO GET IN BED WITH THEM. {END rant time}
I am NOT sorry about my feelings. I have been at gigs both working/playing, and in the audience when fuckheads ruin the party & I had to deal with things. Those of you that know me, the Dr. is not a defensive lineman. But ever since having to literally 'firemans carry' through a large crowd, a female friend that had her leg broken by some shithead that was "moshing" but did not know the rules that if a person goes down on the floor, you do not beat & kick her. We had a car waiting outside by time we got to the door & went to the ER.
By the time we got home, it was 4.5 hours too late to get beer, our friend had 6-8 pins & bits of steel, as well as a cast, and the person that had caused this was still in the ER on the other side of town from the ass whooping that occurred to him after we had left and the guys in the band (we were there as friends of the band mind you), found out & unleashed the beasts on the schmuck.
I hope this kind of shit stops happening. Nothing comes of it except pain for everyone involved.
Blessed Be, & give thought to others,
Dr. Strangelove
Monday, December 06, 2004
O.K. Lets get the rate sheet right.
After last nights intrusion of my peacefully watching TV, I thought I should make this clear:
$100 = 15 min of "I really don't give a shit about what you are saying, but I will nod accordingly
$100 + Beer will extended time, {just like video poker, the more you pay, the longer you stay}
$150 = kissing a psychotic FEMALE, {sorry guys}, in the parking lot.
$275 = bootie Call for sex after hours. {read, wake me up bitch, you are going to pay!..}
$650 = bootie call for what was implied as sex, but became a 12 hour one-way bitch session about your former significant other(s). Gas, travel time, & extras are included in this package.
$98,657.43 = Thank you for paying off my GSL
Now, after reading this....
$100 DOES NOT PAY FOR ME PROVING YOUR HUSBAND IS GAY!
EEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Led got the same offer, but I held out for cash up front.
ALL OFFERS ARE CASH UP FRONT, NO REFUNDS, NO RAINCHECKS.
credit & debit cards are NOT accepted.
But for $99,000 . . . .. .. . . . .
Keep your fluids pure
Blessed Be, Dr. Strangelove
$100 = 15 min of "I really don't give a shit about what you are saying, but I will nod accordingly
$100 + Beer will extended time, {just like video poker, the more you pay, the longer you stay}
$150 = kissing a psychotic FEMALE, {sorry guys}, in the parking lot.
$275 = bootie Call for sex after hours. {read, wake me up bitch, you are going to pay!..}
$650 = bootie call for what was implied as sex, but became a 12 hour one-way bitch session about your former significant other(s). Gas, travel time, & extras are included in this package.
$98,657.43 = Thank you for paying off my GSL
Now, after reading this....
$100 DOES NOT PAY FOR ME PROVING YOUR HUSBAND IS GAY!
EEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Led got the same offer, but I held out for cash up front.
ALL OFFERS ARE CASH UP FRONT, NO REFUNDS, NO RAINCHECKS.
credit & debit cards are NOT accepted.
But for $99,000 . . . .. .. . . . .
Keep your fluids pure
Blessed Be, Dr. Strangelove
Wednesday, December 01, 2004
Why West River people "have that certain glow".
It now can be explained the W.T.F. factor when talking to those from the west river area.
Beware of personal contact with someone from Fall River or Harding. Especially when a female from there offers you a freshly microwaved hot dog. ;-Q,.,.
U.S. Radiation Sites
Where's the mustard & onions?
Dr Strangleove
Beware of personal contact with someone from Fall River or Harding. Especially when a female from there offers you a freshly microwaved hot dog. ;-Q,.,.
U.S. Radiation Sites
Where's the mustard & onions?
Dr Strangleove
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