Monday, December 06, 2004

O.K. Lets get the rate sheet right.

After last nights intrusion of my peacefully watching TV, I thought I should make this clear:

$100 = 15 min of "I really don't give a shit about what you are saying, but I will nod accordingly
$100 + Beer will extended time, {just like video poker, the more you pay, the longer you stay}
$150 = kissing a psychotic FEMALE, {sorry guys}, in the parking lot.
$275 = bootie Call for sex after hours. {read, wake me up bitch, you are going to pay!..}
$650 = bootie call for what was implied as sex, but became a 12 hour one-way bitch session about your former significant other(s). Gas, travel time, & extras are included in this package.
$98,657.43 = Thank you for paying off my GSL

Now, after reading this....

$100 DOES NOT PAY FOR ME PROVING YOUR HUSBAND IS GAY!
EEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Led got the same offer, but I held out for cash up front.

ALL OFFERS ARE CASH UP FRONT, NO REFUNDS, NO RAINCHECKS.
credit & debit cards are NOT accepted.

But for $99,000 . . . .. .. . . . .

Keep your fluids pure
Blessed Be, Dr. Strangelove

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