Remembering the Brotherhood of Yo & Koosh

Almost everyone that reads this & other sites on the 'net have either worked at, or have dealt with someone working at a call center. It is not easy to spend from 8 to 12+ hours a day getting yelled at, assuming the brunt of others anger, try to fix what is wrong, & being personally accused of violating child labor laws. {the customer put his son on the phone to fix the computer @ 12:30am, not me. But I was referred to as a slave driver, etc.}..

So anyway, I was digging around to find some equipment that I needed for my current job and found an unmarked box. I dug it out & opened it and found some of the things that helped to keep me from gassing up the truck & hunting down the assholes I had to deal with on the phones when I was still 'part of the herd'.

Many people do not realize that when they call in to get something fixed, replaced, or need help turning on/using, the object that inevitably they fucked up. It is not smart to threaten the person on the other end of the line.

WE KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE! BE AFRAID, BE VERY, VERY AFRAID . . . .

Aside from common sense, {sometimes not}, the biggest thing that keeps us from tracking you down, ruining your credit report, {you do have a time-share in New Guinea now}, and possibly putting you on the data base as a sexual threat to small Llammas & Lemurs,

Is that we have toys.

I found my Yo-yo's, Klicks, velcro darts, my sticky lizzards, & other sundry things that kept me from hitting the "TELE-TAZER" button to retaliate against the current moron that could not understand that:

• You have to have an active phone line in order to use your modem
• The police will not show up because you have "an illegal error" on your screen
• If the power is off/disconnected, your computer will not turn on
• It is not our responsibility to reset your screensaver back from the slideshow of gay-porn you downloaded from a buddy before your wife & kids see it {poor little kittens}
• When it says "hit any key", the 'anykey' is NOT the blank key in the middle of the arrows. It MEANS "any key on the damn keyboard" just grab the back of your neck & slam your forehead on the keyboard. Trust me, that will take care of the error EVERY TIME!

So we have our toys to satisfy & redirect anger, boredom, & utter perplex of stupidness, in order to serve you better. {and stay out of federal prison}

Just an hint though. Don't try to do an "around the world" with a yo-yo that has a 4.5 year old string without proper safety gear & removing breakables from the area prior.

I can't wait until I find my juggling torches again.

Blessed Be, Dr. S.

LET'S GIT READY TO GAAHHBBLLLE !!! Pt. 1

I thought I should toss off something before having to go & deal with the some of the most concentrated inbread dipshits I have ever had {dis}pleasure to work with.

Yes,Kids! IT'S TURKEY DAYS!

Those of you that have followed some of my exploits know how I feel about this event after working it last year. Those who don't, <{CLICK BACK}> to read my opinion about a whole day set aside to turkeys, chained lawnchairs, and the dumbasses that actually do this annually.

Time to go & pack. hopefully I will not get stormed out by rain.

Dr. S.

Movie Reviews of 2005 #20 - Cry Wolf

I was so disappointed with this movie I posted to IMDB before posting my review here. IMDB has the short & clean version since as I wrote, I realized I needed to tone things down for it to get accepted.

As employees of a theatre, we have to screen the movies in a "dry run" to make sure it was physically assembled properly. In the case of Cry Wolf, the middle four reels could have easily been left in the can & no one would have complained. This movie reminded us all of seeing this movie years ago, but we could not put our fingers on which one it was.

Then is occurred to us that it was not one particular movie, it was bits & pieces of many of the "teen trauma cheesy flicks" from years past, all thrown in to a blender to make a bad vegan breakfast smoothie that would kill off noxious weeds if dumped out.

Imagine a formula movie with:

• some Heathers & Scream with
• a small dash of Indecent Behaviour & Halloween
  
• Puree for 10 seconds.
  
• Add a few pinches of American Psycho
• a handful of crushed lame-ass plot lines
• & a taste of Urban Legends
  
• And continue to mix to a texture of bad.

With the end of the movie you sit & think of all of the plot twists, and background stories, and you wonder what was the point of the last 58 minutes.

This movie is one of many non-impressive, supposed to be something that it is not, should have gone straight to video, movies that have been forced on us in the last year.

All because "Hollywood" has lost its creative originality.

And because of the "reality" trends that have blindsided the industry, like the weather here in S.D., don't expect it to change before it gets more shitty.

It really pisses me off that crap like Alone in the Dark, Hide & Seek, The Ring Two, & The Constant Gardener get green lit for production & release and they end up being SO BAD!

And all of them were promoted as movie genres that they were not. And we cannot just blame the people producing this crap, we the moviegoers need to take blame as well. Nobody has raised a finger about the shit they have been serving us, we just sit back in our couch & swill beer & popcorn with the trusty remote by our side.

STOP THE APATHY & TELL THEM WE WANT MORE THAN TO BE PLACATED!

WE WANT TO BE ENTERTAINED!

Grrrrrrrrrrr!

Blessed Be, Dr. S.

Kory & the Fu(< flys better watch out!

I found this 'One Man Band' named McRorie & thought this guy is nuts! Then I realized I have worked with worse groups in my life.

And since it is a one man show, the crew & promoter have only one ego to deal with. That, & if you watch the videos. This takes some talent.

Not a lot, but a hell more that Kory Van Sickley will ever hope to have.

<{CHECK THIS OUT CLICKING HERE}>

And some of his original music is <{not that bad}>

Rock On, & Keep your earplugs handy:

Dr. S.

Movie Reviews of 2005 #18/19 - A Sound of thunder/Transporter 2

Dues to a technical problem, {that, and we all wanted to see Transporter 2}, we watched 2 movies last night. Both a hella better than 'gardner.

A Sound of Thunder was an interesting movie. Basically we are in 2055 era Chicago, and there has been a discovery of how to go back in time. {sidenote: the Cubs win the series in 2022, I can't wait}, A greedy businessman owns this technology & uses it for sheer profit by holding hunting trips for rich guys to go back in time to hunt dinosaurs. In one trip something happens & sets off a time rift that threatens to ruin civilization & the world as we know it. Blah, blah, blah, they save the world.
Good sci-fi movie & storyline, meets really badspecial effects. This movie has several really good scenes that were overshadowed by effects that could be outdone by a 3-toed sloth on gateway colorbook. Overall it wasn't a bad movie though.

Transporter 2 is a good followup / sequel. Once again, you got cars, guns, chases, well done fights, an interesting series of plot developments, with a dash of humour.
I liked it, I liked it a lot. Although some of the action/stunt scenes are physically impossible in the real world, the suspension of disbelief and your involvement in the story are enough to counter & balance out your enjoyment of the movie.
I recommend this show very much.

I would write more but, after spending about four hours watching movies, & over four hours fixing, rewireing & installing an LED door sign that came back broken from the repair shop, I'm a bit tired.

TTFN, and don't step off the path.

Dr. S.

Movie Reviews of 2005 #17.5 - The Constant Gardener

Bad news guys, The Aristocrats has been pulled from the release for tomorrow. We don't know why, and we don't know when it will get put back on the list. But I will let you all know. As for the review I have of a movie that premiered Weds. night {the last showing had all of 4 people in the audience of one of our 2nd largest capacity screens}

Umm, yeah, The Constant Gardener, {cough}, yeah, Well-ll-ll

How about The constipated Gardener?
The only thing that is more boring & long-winded than this movie is its movie poster that consists of 87% text. The movie was plugged as one of the most anticipated films of the year. Maybe by those with insomnia or other sleep disorders. Action-suspense-thriller? NOT EVEN CLOSE! If you have seen any of the commercials or trailers, you have seen ALL OF THE ACTION, SUSPENSE, AND THRILLS in this shitbomb. Out of five of us, three fell asleep, two for more than 10min. multiple times. We all took multiple breaks to pee or grab a smoke, I myself pee'd 3 times, had 2 cigarettes, and refilled my 32 oz. soda twice. Referring to my original rating scale, it was that bad. Matter of fact it is so bad it does not deserve a spanking, and definitely not the oral-sex, because on its own, it blows !

And as for the R rating, they may have said the "f-word" several times. Other than that, this movie barely deserves PG. They only "sexy bits" were some pregnancy distorted nipples, in VERY soft focus, and an ass shot of her getting out of the shower. Hell, there were more male nipple shots in focus than anything. Makes me wonder if the MMPA has gone rainbow on us all.

One other thing is that this movie runs over two & a quarter hours. It could easily be recut to fit into a one hour timeslot on the WE network. Which there is money riding right now on when that will happen. I don't want to spoil it but, none of us guessed later than new years.

So enough of the rant. Here is the story line:

• Brit. diplomat plays in his garden in Kenya while his wife goes & "saves the world" from plague, aids, TB, and other nasty things
  
• Said wife is murdered & her friend is implicated while they are researching evil doings by the great drug industries of the world that experiment on unwilling people
• find out from the friends associate that the friend "doctor" is gay & would not have had an affair with the wife.
• diplomat gets pissed & takes on where the dead wife left off
• he gets chased {barely} and runs {as only a brit lamely can do}
• after finding what his wife was looking for as proof, the nauti drug company & government officials get slapped on the wrist & the diplomat gets executed.

In short form: couple moves to Kenya, she dies, a friend dies, blame it on evil corporations, mix in a SHIT-TONNE of footage of hopeless, homeless, & hungry women & kids here & there, the guys dies, his buddy exposes all of the bad guys in the government & "the system" Then Sally Struthers comes out wearing a g-string asking for money.

OK, I know the Sally Struthers thing was a bit too much.

They showed her doing a donkey show in Tijuana under the closing credits.

That's how bad this movie was.

Blessed Be. Dr. S

PS/disclaimer: The whole Struthers thing is false. The ASPCA & the Humane Society would have shut the filming down if that were to have happened to that poor donkey.....

The Birthplace of Punk might be closed

If you have not heard yet, the lease on CBGB's expired at midnight. This really disappoints me, and as well many, many music fans around the world. Click the subject line, to find out more. And click the banner to find out how to help save CBGB's.

Blessed Be & pass the earplugs!
Dr. S.